The Life I Would Have Known
by Shinigamislingby
Summary: Arthur wants something to be remembered by. Setting up a band of mismatched exchange students is the only way forward in his eyes.


The words uttered by my friend made me laugh - 'do you want to be in a band?'- I doubt that would ever work. A group of deadbeat exchange students with enough complexes to keep at least 4 psychiatrists in business for years; all sat around loaned or crap instruments, in the founders freezing garage, Not to mention we haven't thought of the technicalities; gigs, promotions, promoters, a manager, a record label. This is by no means me saying that the people are terrible. The people who have been chosen were good, as far as I know, but I don't think we could ever be famous. A crazy Hungarian, an elitist Austrian, an even crazier Belorussian, a socially inept Canadian, a child like Fin, his socially awkward Swede boyfriend, and an overcompensating Brit. Well that is what I have been told about them. Not to mention me. I don't really fit in with them but I kind of cling on. Needless to say I joined. All of the parts were made now. Elizaveta on drums, Arthur on bass, myself on Guitar 1 and the others as the remaining parts. I do not know much about them, just that they are going to be the people I will spend most of my time with now. Most of them I have never met; I have only seen them in classes or the colleges LGBT committee.

"So, ya ready to meet the band?" Arthur spoke in a cracking voice, poking me in the back. I was quickly dragged out of my thoughts and brought back into my apprehension.

"I don't think this will even work." I mumbled, stopping to sigh "unlike that T of yours dude! its really working a treat on them vocal chords. And is that stubble I see?" Arthur smiled at this, glad that the small changes were noticeable. We continued to talk whilst walking with him to his garage- the starting point of every college band. It wasn't a far walk, only to the end of the street.

"So, you planning on taking T gil?! Arthur asked, changing the subject. This was a sore point for me as my little brother and older sister have, but I haven't. All they do is constantly speak of how brilliant it makes them feel mentally, yet I am still here without. It isn't jelousy in any way but most of my anger towards my family stems from this. Clearly I want to but money is such a terrible issue at the moment.I dont want to have to rely on the health services either- they might see my criminal record after all.

"Yeah," I winced, looking away from him, "probably during college. This year, I'll get onto it" I laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of my neck. Arthur then put his hand on my shoulder.

"You know you can talk to me about it if you wish. I know Ludwig and Monika can be rather intimidating to talk to; don't forget, I have 3 older brothers. Just come over to your other brother's house" Arthur laughed, speaking about himself. We had been friends since I moved here as he was the only one who was willing to talk to me. Many of tge school at the time knew why I had moved here and made fun of me constantly, mainly for my accent. Arthur, nevertheless, befreinded me and we stayed best friends all the way through secondary school and the first year of college.

They were all waiting in there, poised at instruments. Most of their faces were ones that I did not know.

"I will drop the conversation now, lets carry on with the band stuff" he whispered before turning into the garage. "We are gonna do great and go somewhere with this, if you lot are dedicated enough" Arthur spoke, addressing my doubts and speaking to the others "now, make friends"

A cacophony of noise filled the frozen garage, they were all so willing to talk to each other- apart from one. He sat alone, not by any instrument and away from the mass of noise. I walked over to him, willing to speak with him first. Although he wouldn't speak with the others, he was happy enough to speak with me on my own.

"Hello?" a rather timid voice came from the man, he seemed as though he was going to cry.

"Ya ok? Hope you know that I won't bite." I grinned, trying to sound considerate for once in my life. He adjusted his glasses and shook my hand.

"No need to be so formal mate" I laughed, our corner of the room then falling silent.

I took a moment to look at him properly. He was staring back at me through his circular, wire rimmed glasses. His eyes were violet, something peculiar bit they came as a cool surprise. Probably colour contacts anyway. As if my eyes were weird enough, being of a red colour, his were even worse. Bright blond hair fell in gentle waves onto his shoulders, this was made to look longer by the red hoodie obstructing its flow. He was tanned but not as dark as some from our college. He was rather tall, probably taller than me, and broad- he was thin though, with no hint of muscle. The more I looked at him, the redder his soft face grew. Due to this, I stared at him with all my might.

"I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name" he spoke in a voice like silk.

"Gilbert Beilschmidt, what's yours?" I answered, his question caught me off guard. I was still looking into his eyes. They were pure- if not naïve- and full of fear. I wanted to dismiss this time but my tone and voice are probably making him worse.

"Matthew Williams" he stated with a wavering smile. Normally, people like this would annoy me but he is different. He is hot, no doubt about that, and seemingly interesting. What's there not to like?

"Shall we go meet the others?" I asked, standing up. I shook off my previous thought, despite them wanting to lodge themselves in there. Maybe he would go speak with them now there is someone he knows. He nodded simply, standing up after that. Just as I thought- he is a good 4 inches taller than me.

We both walked into a smaller group of people who were talking amongst themselves. I clasped eyes on the tallest one, he was probably even taller than Matthew. He had blond hair, it was almost as white as mine though, and a stern glare. He was completely straight- faced, almost too intimidating to look at. His cold grey eyes were framed with thick black glasses which found themselves frequently pushed up his face.

"My, my aren't you tall!" I laughed, tapping his shoulder.

"Yes, and so are you." he smiled forcefully. "My name is Berwald Oxenstierna."

"And mine is Gilbert Bielschmidt." I nodded. He was completely straight-faced, almost intimidating to stare at. .

"What do you play?" I asked, attempting to spark conversation with the man.

"Well guitar but I am not that good." he told me, probably a lie. A rather small man overheard us talking and turned to join.

"He is being humble, his guitar skills are brilliant." the man spoke, smiling wildly. He was at least a foot shorter than Berwald but was much louder. They shared vaguely similar features, almost white hair and piercingly blue eyes.

"I wouldn't say that." Berwald mumbled, looking to the man.

"Tell the truth, you know that you are brilliant." he smiled, falling into Berwald's presence- resting against his arm.

"My name is Tino Väinimöinen by the way." the small man spoke again, away from topic.

"What do you play. My name's Gilbert, nice ta meet ya by the way." I grinned.

"I play the guitar too, and sing a bit." he smiled, still wrapped around Berwald's arm. "What about you?"

"Bit of guitar, bit of bass. Depends on the day, I suppose. I also play flute but what kinda metal band needs a flute?"

"Enough of the niceties ladies, and Liz, we need to get down to business. You will have time to speak to each other when we are at Liz's flat. Over booze if you ask me. We will be living there for the time being so say goodbye to your mother's basement- that means you Gilbert." Arthur began, laughing at me before speaking again. "We need to make up a name, genre and ideas before we can do anything. Make yourselves useful for a while and then I will tell you when we are gonna go get our stuff and move."

We all stood at our different places, my beaten up Les Paul in the corner. This speech made us all then move to the places of our instruments. I sat, cross legged on the floor with my guitar in my lap. My hands then began playing around the guitar's body; scales, chords, made up pieces. I had never tried to make my own song before so I had no idea what I was doing. Shortly after this, Berwald and Tino sat beside me.

"It would be best if we stuck together, wouldn't it." Tino spoke, lifting his guitar onto his lap. He began playing an intricate melody, his eyes fixed on the grey-white body of the guitar. I couldn't help but marvel at this, the chords and notes were played with such speed and accuracy.

"What was that?!" I exclaimed, still awestruck at this.

"Oh, I was learning one of my favourite songs from a band called Wintersun. That was a part of it." he spoke with a reddening face and a sheepish smile.

"I can't even play a chord, let alone that." Berwald mumbled. It was rather difficult to tell when he was joking or being serious due to his constant frown. Judging by Tino's reaction, he was joking.

"That is a lie and you know it. Play the one i taught you."

"Which one?"

"Månegarm." I am guessing that they like the same music. I know the bands but they aren't really the thing that I like. I prefer bands like The Defiled or Rammstein.

Berwald nodded and began to play. His hand movements were clumsy and sometimes missed the fret but he put all of his heart into it. It wasn't as intricate as the other song, mainly just loud chords, but it wasn't easy either- it would have taken me a while to learn it.

"See, you can play." Tino added aggressively as Berwald stopped.

"I don't even know the entire song." he mumbled, adjusting his glasses and then returning to resting his arm on his guitar.

"I have a book of songs if you want to learn them, both sheet music and TAB. They are the kinda stuff I like though and the instructions are in Finnish but you can have a go if you like."

"As you know, I know a little of your language." he smiled and places his head on Tino's hair with a hum.

"What kinda stuff do you like?" I asked the both of them.

"Anything metal but especially melodic and folk metal. Stuff like Avantasia and Korpiklaani, they're my favourites at the moment." Tino answered first, as he was the more talkative one. He could talk more than me and that is saying something ridiculous.

"I like more mellow things; classical, anything instrumental. But I do like metal bands- they have to have something special for me to like them though." Berwald nodded, reassuring him of his answer.

"I like most metal, most music really. Apart from Jazz, that is just ridiculous. My favorite band at the moment is Emigrate, I don't know what they would really be called but they speak to me." I laugh, covering up the musical truth with a joke.

"Nice to see you guys being productive. What you gossiping about?" Arthur laughed, standing behind Tino. He clearly took this as a large threat, moving away from Arthur as soon as he noticed. Arthur shook this off and sat down, infront of me.

"I don't really have anything to do at this moment. Eliza is playing something, so is Rod. Matthew is making up lyrics, Natalya is back home looking for her violin. You guys are my best bet at gettin anything done.

"Well, our gathering is always up for one more." I grinned at my old friend.

"Why did you think of the band idea anyway?" Tino asked, forgetting his earlier aggression.

"Short answer or long?"

"Long I suppose, it puts off actually working for another few minutes" I butted in with a wild grin.

"Well, I wanted to be proud of something in my life- music seemed to be my only calling. I picked you guys out cause I noticed that you all have done some form of music. whether that be in the past, as an A Level or as some side lessons. Some of you needed something to do too, eh Gil?" he snickered. I can agree with his comment on needing something to be proud of, I do not have that either. I find no joy in my college work, the only pride I get us from my baking and music.

"How long will we be waiting here?" Berwald piped up, it was probably the first time that he had spoken in any form of group larger than 3.

"Until Nat gets back, then we'll go to the flat. I think it would be best if we all headed to our houses and grabbed stuff now. I'll just go tell the others. We've all officially moved out!" he bawled the last part.

We all went our separate ways once Arthur had told the entire group- all going home to gather important things for the move. This will be most likely until we get enough money to buy a bigger house, or until the band breaks up. Whichever comes around first. Knowing this group, the latter seems more plausible- but all of my faith lay in the first.

I will need to leave a note for my little brother also, he is expecting me after school. I will most likely write him a note- phoning him will be no use as he will probably twist my words. I have no idea what to write though; he will tell mother and father either way, convincing them that I have dropped out of college.

The front door was in sight but I didn't want to go in. This was because of how empty the house would be right now. There was no loud music or drunken singing- not even Feliciano's guitar playing. He would sit on the table and play songs from his grandfather's old acoustic guitar. Ludwig and I attempting to sing along, despite an exasperated Feliciano teaching us the words for the 20th time. These songs usually lead to inappropriate improvisations. Hearing the house so silent upset me in a way; as this was a place of happiness and there wasn't any to be seen. I unlocked the door and headed upstairs, only closing the door lightly. If I have to carry as much as I think I will have to, closing the door in any way would be stupid.

I began throwing clothes into a suitcase, that wasn't even mine, before collecting other things that I may need. My History and English books being the main part of this other bag. Of course the other part was my notebooks of additional information. Next was my phone charger, pocket amp, and private notebooks. I packed some of my CDs into another bag; this followed by music books stolen from my old sessions. I picked up a pile of letters, held together by a fraying elastic band, from my mother. Many of them spoke of how life was back home and the festivals I once loved.

I took a look back at my seemingly empty room before writing a note for Ludwig.

Lud,

Don't get me wrong when I say this, I haven't dropped out of collage. I'm going to move in with my band, we will only be on the other side of town. Don't worry, you haven't gotten rid of me yet. Say hi to Feli for me and don't get into any trouble- stay safe lil bro.

Leib' dich

Gil

With suitcase, 2 bags, and the letter in hand, I take my awkward descent to the front door. Kicking the door open was a rather stupid idea- considering that Arthur was stood on the other side of it.

He managed to stop the door before it hit him, causing it to swing back into the suitcase.

"An' this is why I came to help ya mate." he laughed, taking the bags and helping me lift the suitcase down the steps.

"Thanks mate, just need to put this in the kitchen for Lud." I told him before entering the house again. I placed the note on the table and grabbed a can of cola from the fridge.

"You want one?" I ask Arthur, leaning around the door and waving the can in his line of vision.

"Yeah, go on then."

"Have the others gotten back to yours yet?" I asked, cracking open the can with one hand.

"Some, Nat was there when I left so we'll probably just wait for the others and then make a leave to Liz's." he nodded.

"We going from your house then?" I ask the stupidest question possible after drinking some of the cold soda.

"Yeah, there's a bus stop right outside mine" Just after he had finished talking, my phone's text alert made a loud beeping noise. It was Elizaveta and the text read.

Dude, you gotta come quick!!! Have you seen Natalya!???? Man, she may be anti-social but she has possibly stolen my heart. Help my weak ass!!!!!

I laughed at this and then began to type a reply.

Dw Liz, I'll come up with something.

"Who was that?" Arthur spoke, craning his neck so that he could see the message.

"Oh its only Elizaveta, I believe she has met Nat. Nothin' good can come from that." I smirked. As we turned back onto Arthur's garden, Elizaveta stopped me.She gave me a look of false anger and truthful worry.

"Dude, go over there." she called to me, pointing to the other side of the house.

"What's up?" I asked when both of us were on the other side.

"Good god help me" she spoke way too fast to keep up. "She spoke to me and her voice was so sweet, it was like I was being hit with a bus. And those eyes, man...' she trailed off. I couldn't help but laugh because I have felt the same about another.

"I'll arrange something." I smirked, waking away quickly.

"What do you mean by that, asshole?!" she growled, trying to catch up with me. I was actually looking for Arthur.

"Hey, you know the room arrangements? Make sure Liz and Nat are together." I spoke upon seeing Arthur.

"That grin doesn't fill me with confidence Beilschmidt." he sighed, "but ok"

Matthew joined us all after this, completing the group- we then had to wait for the bus to Elizaveta's. We all had at least 3 bags each and an instrument, so getting on the bus was going to be an unwanted mission. We were stood in the cold for over 15 minutes- animated conversation filling the air.

"So what do you all study? I do history and German A Levels." I ask, starting yet another conversation.

"Music BTEC with additional theory A Level, always fun." Roderich spoke first; this was actually the first time that I had spoken to the man, despite him being in my additional classes.

"French, Psychology, and Catering A Levels here" Elizaveta added.

"Yeah, I know what you do dumbass" I laughed as loudly as humanly possible, throwing my head back in the process.

"English language, literature, and creative writing." Arthur told us, with a reassuring nod.

"Basically you fuck the English language?" Elizaveta smirked, poking him.

"I do art!" Tino exclaimed, lifting the mood a little.

" I take Psychology, music, and drama" Natalya answered without changing facial expression. Now I know what Elizaveta meant, her voice is beautiful.

"I take ICT, c...chemistry, and French" Matthew stuttered, trying his hardest to speak as clearly as possible. I much prefer his voice though.

"And I take Maths, Biology, and Physics. A little boring but it's something" Berwald finished the circle.

"So what brought you to this little college, well England too?" Arthur asked, as he was the only English person here. 'schooling was better' or, 'I fancied a change' were the main answers but I knew these were lies. Mine was far from that of the schooling or area. Yes, I wanted a change but it was mainly because of the people who lived there. They would bully my little brother so, one day, I beat them all up. The one boy was left in a coma so my mother said that it would be better if I moved country. Basically to save myself from prison. Ludwig came with me, as a way of repaying me for beating his bullies

He said that, by coming with me, he is helping me overcome a worry in my life- as I have helped him with one of his.


End file.
